Raising children is one of the most rewarding and the most difficult tasks one can take on. To raise children who are more than just polite and productive members of society takes even more intentional training. Here are three lessons, that are truly gifts, which you can give your children to serve them well for their entire life.
The Gift of Boredom–
Boredom is often avoided at all costs these days, especially in the age of iphones, tablets, and on demand TV. However, letting your child be “bored” may be one of the best things you can let happen to them. Psychologists say that a bored state causes the mind to begin daydreaming. It is in this state of daydreaming that the mind begins to imagine and create.
In an article that appeared in the C.S. Lewis Institute Report, Art Lindsley, Ph.D. wrote the following,
“Imagination played a key role in (C.S.) Lewis’s conversion. Through the reading of George MacDonald’s Christian fantasy, Phantastes, Lewis reported that a new quality, “a bright shadow,” leapt off the page. Later he described the new quality as “holiness,” recalling this time as a baptism of his own imagination. Although Lewis still needed to confront certain rational objections to the Christian faith—and to finally submit his will to what he had discovered—his “baptism of the imagination” was the starting point in his journey to faith.” (You can read the full article here here )
The ability to create is not just important to the individual child but also to the body of Christ!
The world of the arts needs parents and children who have imaginations that are pure and not darkened by the perversion of the world. They need imaginations that don’t just copy what they see others doing, but imaginations that have been baptized!
The ability to create stories and proclaim the gospel in a creative way are vital! These creations may be viewed by people who will never darken the door of a church. We see this type of story in 2 Samuel 12 when the prophet Nathan rebukes David. Instead of coming out and telling David what his sin was, he tells him a story. While listening to the story, David’s anger rages against the man who did wrong! Nathan then reveals to David that he is that man! What a powerful use of story! Being bored is not a bad thing, especially when it can be used for the kingdom of God!
The Gift of Receiving Correction
Several years ago when we started taking music at the Conservatory of Annie Moses, my children participated in a Master Class each week. Each week students took turns performing a music piece in front of their peers and an instructor. The instructor would then give them feedback on their performance. When this first started I was fearful! My children were young and the thought of them being publicly corrected or critiqued made me cringe! However, I was shocked when they didn’t share my same fears! In fact, they thrived under it! That was the beginning of me learning that correction and critique are not bad things!
I truly believe that the ability to receive correction and critique between a child and a parent begins with one simple word – Love.
When children feel loved, they receive correction easier. I John 4:18 shows us this biblical principle, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out all fear.” When we recognize God’s love for us, and we are in right standing with Him, we can trust He will take care of us. His perfect love allows us to be at peace and not in fear. It is the same with children. When they feel loved by us, they are able to accept correction because fear has been cast out.
Love and the ability to receive critique and correction is what I witnessed in Master Class when my children were younger. They knew they were loved and therefore did not fear what was said. When their bow hold was corrected, even if it was in front of their peers, they received the correction and changed their bow hold! Learning to handle correction is not only a childhood skill, but it is also a life long attitude we should always have, in particular when it comes from the Lord. In fact, receiving correction is a sign of sonship!
Hebrews 12:6 tells us, “For the LORD disciplines those He loves, and He punishes each one he accepts as his child.”
Building this type of relationship is invaluable, especially during the teenage years. My children know I will tell them the truth whether it concerns a piece they are playing, a clothing choice, or a deeper matter of the heart!
The Gift of Bold Faith
This is the last of the gifts, but definitely not the least important! As the days grow darker spiritually, this last gift is imperative. The life of a Christian cannot be marked by fear! In fact Hebrews 10:38 tells us, “But My righteous one will live by faith; and if he shrinks back, I will take no pleasure in him.” Teaching your children to be thinkers, to articulate what they believe, and to bravely obey God’s commands is not optional. It is a must!
What better way for them to learn than by watching their parents live it out in front of them. When parents lead by example, their children can’t help but see God at work. Why? Because when you are living a bold life of faith it will affect everything about you. It will change how you spend your money, how you spend your time, and how you pray! Your children will see what it means to trust God, and they will see first hand a miracle working God! The lessons they will learn from you will not be forgotten.
When my children were younger, I loved to read stories of great missionaries to them! However, I can read all the stories I want, but if my life doesn’t show dependence on God, how can I expect my children to live any differently?
There are many gifts you will give your children throughout their life. However these three gifts will change not only their life but also those around them!
If you enjoyed this post, here is another post on shepherding your child’s gifts you may enjoy! (Click Here)
Effie Franks says
This is great. Thank you.
Kim@kimborders.com says
Thank you so much. Thank you for taking the time to read it!
Ginna says
As always, true words of wisdom. Thanks for sharing.
Marquel says
Thank you so much for the encouragement I’m not a parent but I wanna walk in this truth I wanna live by this truth.
I don’t wanna shrink back in fear
I wanna be perfect in love
How can I better my relationship with Jesus Christ?